Personal Power - Part 1

Email Series Part 1

Personal Power Email Series - Part 1

In this series of articles on Personal Power, we're going to be looking at various angles and perspectives and different ways of coming at the idea of Personal Power.

[Background: What is personal power?]

All of us have an intuitive sense of what Personal Power is and what it means to be powerful, and we also have representations that we have collected during a lifetime of exposure to parents, siblings, family, friends, school, work, and society through personal and media input. So consider the possibility athat some of the concepts that we have inherited around the ideas of power, and how it is commonly represented in society, is skewed to the external factors that may not be the best ways to think about it, let alone finding ways to feel more personally powerful in ourselves, and in our lives, and in the world.

[Common representations of power]

Stop for a minute and consider what it means to be powerful. A few common representations might be…

Wealth: Financial resources and control.

Position/authority: High-ranking roles and decision-making power.

Knowledge/expertise: Specialized skills or insights.

Social influence: Large networks or follower base.

Charisma/persuasion: Ability to inspire and influence others.

Physical strength: Athletic or physical prowess.

Resource control: Dictating access to essential assets.

Notice that all of these imply some version of having power over something or someone.

[External Power vs Internal Power]

Now contrast that to what it feels like to have an internal sense of agency and autonomy in yourself, before you ever try and do something in the world. Obviously, the two are closely related, however there can be a gulf between the various strategies and avenues we use to go about seeking power if we have not got these distinctions absolutely clear. We all know people who are committed to seeking external manifestations of power, and often it’s for the purpose of compensating for (and aiming to overcome) an internal sense of feeling helpless or powerless - these are people who are strongly motivated and driven by a compelling fear of ever feeling that way.

[Two ways of displaying power]

So there seems to be at least two prevailing ways that power is displayed by people in the world. One is a compensatory way to cope with an inner insecurity, often displaying traits of coercion and manipulation, and the other comes from a place of inner strength and a grounded comfort in oneself, which is a much more harmonious way to be, without any less agency or capacity to fulfil one's meaning and purpose in the world.

———————————————

[The two types of power]

The key here is that cultivating these two types of power require very different strategies and come from very different worldviews and mindsets.

[Topics in This Series]

In this series, we’ll look at the following topics:

1. What is Personal Power?

2. Power over (force) vs. Power to (flow)

3. Competing Commitments of Personal Power

4. Reclaiming Your Personal Power

5. Completing Developmental Tasks 

6. Cultivating Personal Power

7. Applications of Personal Power

So before we do that, let’s look at why we would even want to go after this thing we are calling Personal Power - i.e. how would you even know if you had it?

[Benefits of Personal Power]

Some Benefits of Personal Power

Increased self-confidence: Belief in oneself and abilities.

Greater purpose: Alignment with values, leading to fulfillment.

Improved decision-making: Independent, self-driven choices.

Stronger boundaries: Healthy limits with others, improved relationships.

Increased resilience: Ability to overcome challenges and setbacks.

Enhanced self-leadership: Inspiring and motivating oneself (and others).

Greater control: Sense of mastery over life and future, leading to well-being.

That all sounds great, doesn’t it?

[Illusion of Language and Internal Conflict]

The slightly controversial bit! (stay with me on this bit please)

I’m going to make a claim that there is a bit of an illusion of language going on there. We read those statements, and most of us create/construct images from those statements and then we feel good about how we would feel if it was us in those images having those things, right?

And notice that all these above are all inner and outer expressions of some (magical, mysterious) inner change that has already happened somehow, when we have ‘got’ or ‘gained’ or ‘attained’ personal power.

So, what is this inner change really? And how does it come about?

[Conditioning around Power]

I think the hidden trap in all this comes from the very way we have been conditioned around notions of power, that leads us to go about seeking power in ways that don't work very well. Specifically, notice that many of the benefits above more naturally come about when we are no longer internally fighting with ourselves, and not when we have overcome something - and this is the key. i.e., when we are congruent and aligned and internally coherent and integrated Personal Power comes about naturally. 

However, the primary relationship that most people have to power is the exertion of force to overcome some resistance.

———————————————

[Don’t fight with yourself]

This is fine, until the source of that resistance is internal, at which point, this is just a recipe to get into further internal conflict, contradiction and resistance and many eventually get exhausted, wondering why their efforts have not yielded the ‘promised’ results despite all the efforts - it’s sadly all too common to hear about people these days who either went through, or are going through, burnout while they were striving to achieve something or to be more successful in the world and, ultimately aiming to have more (personal) power.

[Fitness Analogy]

Fitness as an Analogy

Now, think about fitness… ‘fitness’ is also an abstract noun like ‘personal power,’ however, notice it’s the description of a state and a set of conditions of how we are being once we’ve done certain things to ‘get fit’. This provides a very important clue as to what to do if we want Personal Power -reduce internal resistance and contradiction - not add to it by trying to overcome resistance! I’ll go into exactly what to do later in the series, specifically in the sections on Reclaiming & Cultivating Personal Power, but first this is a key distinction to land.

[What we are doing is mostly wrong]

Then we'll see that it’s actually very often the case that we don’t actually do many (or hardly any) of the things that would actually transform us and lead to us arriving at this state and condition of being, called having Personal Power - in simpler terms, you cannot expect to defeat yourself and win!

[Summary: Benefits of more flow]

So, what does this mean?

In this series of articles, I’ll do my best to clarify some of the key distinctions that I think can lead to a much clearer route and the actions to take, towards you having more Personal Power - i.e. a way of being in the world, where, as the Taoists would say…

“The Tao does nothing, and nothing is left undone.” Lao Tse

It’s a description of a state of more flow.

It means aligning the life force within you and reducing and resolving the internal contradictions so you can be more in harmony with yourself, with others, and with the world. Then, you might find that somehow, a lot more gets done, and with a lot less energy, strife, or stress.

By understanding and cultivating Personal Power, you'll be better equipped to navigate life's challenges, maintain strong relationships, and ultimately, live a more fulfilling and purposeful life.

Look out for the next email in the series,

Anand